This diagram will have to be larger, because there is also The Web. I don’t think I have any game at all, I’m either throwing myself at a guy, or I’m not interested. But now I’m in the transitional years, I mean, months, where I’m trying to mature into something less sixteen. Thankfully, I have The Web, to see me through.

The Web is something my best friend Dan described me having. It’s this thing about me where guys just kind of get stuck in. I don’t necessarily try (those guys are walking on a waxed floor), no The Web is something else.

Miguel might be stuck in The Web. Maybe. Is it charm? I don’t know. I think it’s more than that, but I’m not the one to talk about what it is. I’ll have to get Dan in here.

So…Game vs. The Web

People that might be called an atomic C.B. would probably fall under having Game. And whether or not they genuinely cared would be up for review. But those that have The Web, might or might not have Game. Game, in my eyes, can sometimes be self made. How do we distinguish between the two? Don’t wear your cologne, leave your Kenneth Cole shoes at home, wear something other than black or cashmere, let let me know if the girls/or guys, still come to you. If they do, you probably have The Web, and not just Game.

Lets keep talking about this. I’m so happy that you brought this up again.

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Now, you tell me…is this the smartest thing I ever did with a man or is it not caring?

Earlier this year I met a man at a dinner party who I emailed outside of the group and told him I would be interested in having coffee or dinner with him if things didn’t work out with the woman he had newly started dating. And after that, I didn’t express any interest. (new behaviour for me). Anyway, he checked in with me once a month to say hi, and recently suggested we get together to catch up. It will be the first time I’ve seen him in four months. It will be interesting because as an experiment, did I truly do the right thing? Is this a good relationship tactic, or did I just not care?

If my typical MO is to show my interest, regardless of what The Rules say, is it possible for me to successfully act in any other way than my typical MO? A friend, tells me, that I should give up trying to change. That if it’s my MO to be the aggressor, I’m just stuck with it. I’d like to think that he is right.

I don’t want Game or to play games. I can wait for straight caring. Due East for me, please. Web or no web.

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I mean, West. Due West.

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Yes, you have what the French would call a certain something special. But part of that, at least for me, is the lack of interest on your part. It’s a safe crush, like the practice crushes pre-teen girls have on boy bands like Menudo and NKOTB.

If you actually started caring, then I’d probably freak. I’m not sure how that relates to our diagram (btw, we’re going to need a 3d model, with The Web as the Z axis. Yes, I *did* get a perfect score on my math SAT).

As far as leaving the Kenneth Cole shoes at home and so on, a parable, or possibly an allegory. Last year at the big Lake Quinalt Halloween party I was a Golden God. Tight gold pants, gold body painted torso and gold sun mask. And I picked up(though it was my ex).

This year, I went as Gollum from LOTR. Gollum mask, grey loincloth, pasty body.

Not even a hint of interest from any of the ladies.

Although, that could be that I’m currently in a Not caring, no game mode.

Was this going somewhere? Absolutely not. Btw, I got a haircut and some new clothes ($200 jeans! Pinstriped pants! Yes, I’m auditioning for both the Tom Wolfe and male fashion model parts.) No ones come remotely close to hitting on me.

Not that I’d notice at this point in the quadrant.

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Wait a second….you got a hair cut?! Are we talking a refreshing trim or megachop?!

When I first met you I tried to imagine you with short hair to see if I could be interested in you. But the blue toenails ruined it. So, don’t freak, I’m definitely not switching to caring. Just curious. How short?

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Jen has asked me to clarify The Web. After reading the conversation on this topic up until now, I’m not quite sure I’m tracking. I think I get the four-box model but can’t be completely sure. I also think Jen and Miguel are flirting but I have no back story. So I’m just dropping in to do my part and then I’ll let you all return to your part philosophy discussion/ part hookup prelude.

Jen’s Web was created long before the world wide one. It was frankly at it’s most powerful back in high school when she had no pretensions of bagging Mr. Right. She would prance down the halls, spinning a sticky gossamer that trapped men by the dozens. Their heart ached for her. She had to check her yearbook to figure out who they even were. Every week brought another weepy confession from some doe-eyed sucker.

Over the years, the web has been used less often. I believe it’s because Jen now searches for quality. (Man, do I have some stories from back in the quantity days!) But I also think it’s because she is more self concious about her web use. She does care, dammit, and she has trouble stopping herself from caring. And the best spiders are the ones who just spin for the hell of it…because they can. Not because they have a twenty step program for bagging the fly.

Don’t get me wrong. It isn’t gone. She still gets ‘em all wrapped up and useless. But she often starts fussing with them once they’re caught instead of eating them outright. Like the villain who explains his entire plot to take over the world instead of killing our hero right there and then (allowing the lucky chap to escape). So while her web-to-kill ratio has fallen precipetously (I’m sure I spelled that wrong), she’s become a kinder, gentler spider.

I’ve completely forgotten what I’m talking about. Let me know if that made any sense.

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Ah. Well, the way you describe the web Dan B, it seems like the Web is a specialized pheremone based specialization of Game affected by the same rules of caring/not caring.

As far as the doe-eyed suckers, I think I would’ve been one, back in the days before I had status and before I had a pager (+ 3 blogger bonus points for obscure hip-hop reference). But at some point, I decided that being the ‘Nice Guy’ meant nothing but ‘Let’s just be friends’ and lonely nights masturbating. Honestly, I don’t think I’m bitter.

Jen as web-spinning coquette? On the playa, we’d name her Ariadne. These days, I’ve learned to be vary, vary wary of that girl that everyone at the party is drawn to. There’s a short story that I can’t remember about just this kind of woman. Somebody more literate and with a larger percentage of remaining brain cells can chime in.

And Jen and I are either flirting or she’s tormenting based on perspective. Personally? I don’t care. 8^P

As far as the quantity stories, I’d love to hear them. Do you accept PayPal?

Incidentally, I’ve foregone playing Halo2 today in order to go to the gym, go to the coffee shop and most importantly, transfer my blogging energies into the comments section on Sean’s site.

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Sorry, just tormenting in good fun.

But just think, someday we’ll both have regular 8-6pm jobs and won’t have the time to transfer our blogging energies into the comments section of Sean’s site. Might as well now!

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